Behold the ravages of time!

Posted July 14, 2003 8:47 AM.

This is going to sound ridiculous, but when I turned thirty, never in my wildest dreams did I actually think that time was going to continue moving after said birthday. Certainly I didn't think that there would be birthdays after my thirtieth. It seemed so final - such an achievement! So it's coming as a bit of a shock that this coming Saturday I'm going to turn thirty-one. Here's an random analogy which might explain the sensation a bit - you climb Everest and you're terribly proud of yourself and then suddenly you turn around and the mountain's grown another few thousand feet. And then some nutter with a whip turns out and makes you start climbing. Or maybe it should be that you're on a sledge going down a steep ravine and you can see the end in sight and the sledge slows down and frankly you're a bit relieved, but then you've got slightly too much momentum and you end up zooming right past the relatively flat bit and down yet another ravine. It's kind of like that.

Hmm. Anyway - it would seem cheap to direct people towards my wishlist, and god knows I'm not a cheap man. So, obviously, I won't be doing that... No sirree. I'll just stand here patiently making knowing looks and whistling to myself... Ho hum...

Comments

Please stay on-topic, informative and polite. I reserve the right to remove comments for whatever vague capricious reasons seem reasonable at the time.

If you were a cheap man, the gifts wouldn't be so expensive!

Happy birthday, I'll spare you the singing.

→ Posted by: Martin Wisse at July 14, 2003 10:19 AM

Oh, and happy birthday.

→ Posted by: Ben at July 14, 2003 2:15 PM

Speaking as someone who is spending a fair amount of time "consoling" a significant someone who has her 31st on Thursday, I know you are not alone. But, as someone who cruised through the non-event of 32 in May, I can say that it is just something that is part of being a 30something, and probably becomes less consequential with time. I know it almost sounds trite to say this, but what difference does age make? Or getting older for that matter? Will you be any different on Monday next week to the way you are today? Doubt it somehow - perhaps in a little small way, one of those tiny steps we take as we gradually change on the path through life, but not some big significant change.
As I look at my older 30something friends, and the 40somethings too, I think that it all just gets better. In hindsight, the 20s were pants. Perhaps if I had known then what I know now, I might have made better use of those years, but then again, going through them in the way I did informed me and shaped me into the fat balding bloke I am now.
Anyway, have a good day Tom.

→ Posted by: Graybo at July 14, 2003 4:27 PM

Things definitely get better the further you go. I just turned 30 recently too. On one hand it's a little scary that so much life as gone under the bridge already, but I can't say I would have done anything differently had I the chance. I got through my 20s as best I could. Things are better today than they ever were. Here's to the future always getting better, never worse. Happy b'day, Tom.

→ Posted by: bk at July 14, 2003 5:55 PM

You and I share the same birthday, apparently. So Happy Birthday to us. I've got one year on you so I'll be 32 on Saturday.

I used to think life would stop at 18, then 21, then 25, then 30. I just kept moving the bar. Now I can finally envision getting old. It's odd. You start envisioning what would be the sexiest way to go bald ("Jean-Luc Picard, yeah that'll work. I just need to lose 50 pounds").

→ Posted by: John at July 14, 2003 6:23 PM

30 is one of those sort of 'woohoo' birthdays - big party, lots of presents, all very landmarkish. 31 is more 'Wait! 31 did you say? How did that happen? I don't remember signing up for a 31! I thought I'd just stay, y'know, 30...'. 32, on the other hand, is when you look back longingly at 30 and wonder where everything went wrong and, in particular, what happened to that really big pay cheque you thought was in the post.

Still, at least I'm now at the age when looking younger than I actually am no longer results in my being ejected from bars. I had wondered at what age 'Gosh I thought you were a lot younger' would turn from being an insult into being a compliment, and it seems 32 is it.

Happy birthday, Tom. Have a good one and just remember that you can start lying about your age now.

→ Posted by: Suw at July 14, 2003 6:46 PM

35 is when it starts getting good. Trust me. There's so much I no longer care about it, and i can look at youngsters with a benign pity. I'm comfortable where I am. I am beginning to become myself.

→ Posted by: Gert at July 15, 2003 12:07 AM

And I thought I was old when I turned 20 last month... but seriously, what it's taught me is that age is just a number we assign ourselves. Age, like all things can be relative.

→ Posted by: Bryan at July 15, 2003 1:01 AM

Happy Birthday Tom. Gert's comment is lovely. I'm getting older too, at the end of the month I'll be 32. Since I've turned 30 I've become a lot more thoughtful. I can relate very well to the mountain metaphor, it feels like you have a base camp and keep having to climb mountains and sometimes get pulled out of crevasses.
In your 30s (and I guess 40s too) life doesn't stop throwing things at you, it changes though, maybe the dreaminess fades.

→ Posted by: Gavin Bell at July 17, 2003 9:06 PM

Happy Birthday Tom - and no comments about your attachment status! Age is mellowing you! Ahhh... age and gays. You're already old enough for many 16-22 year olds to start treating you with hurtful disdain, or even ruling out any contact with you at all on principle. Yet how young you look to me with almost 15 years on you. (The melancholy turns serious...) But gay gays don't help one another out enough with the meaning and experience of ageing (as for our straight siblings world literature and national culture, parents, children, in-laws all do). Looking back from 45 my thirties now appear to be the very prime of life -- physically strong, fit, slim, and great in leather; aware, experienced, easy-going; popular, personally powerful, confident; still full of potential and opportunity. So where are the achievements? They must be there. I didn't even meet my lover of 11 years until I was 34. So your birthday's a chance for me to talk about me... Not completely: all the very very best to you Tom, and lots of love from Charlie.

→ Posted by: Charlie B. at July 19, 2003 1:07 PM

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