Archives for Humour
Shiny TV lady watches me clean my flat... (October 11, 2006) Well here's something weird that happened to me today. Yahoo! has this thing called The 9 and it's like nine memes that they think are funny or cool or interesting or whatever and it's presented by this lady who is...
Clean your flat in sixty seconds... (October 6, 2006) I just got back from the US after Hack Day and I've been away a while and I'd forgotten what a wreck my flat had become in the build-up to Future of Web Apps. Anyway, I'd been recently introduced to...
The Evil Tree of Evolution... (September 7, 2006) Added 10.30pm: It has been pointed out to me that in fact the image below is a spoof and that I am really quite quite stupid! I will be leaving the evidence for my crapulence below in perpetuity as a...
My dark secret is out.... (August 30, 2006) It seems my secret is finally out - I pay my bills and lead my decadent glamourous lifestyle through my experitise in online poker! And I live in the Castro Valley! And my beard is awesome! Thanks to Nikolaj for...
Superman vs. Wikis... (August 17, 2006) It's not really versus as such. I went for the sensationalist title. Apologies. Anyway, a depowered Clark Kent in the latest issue of >52 has an assistant use a wiki to look up a weird alien creature that has appeared...
Do you like crisps? (August 2, 2006) It's been getting such a lot of entertaining responses on Flickr that I thought maybe I should post this little creation of Paul Hammond and Simon Willison more publically: I mean, who's going to say no to that? More seriously,...
How to attract Jeff Bezos' attention... (July 20, 2006) So Jeff Bezos has invested in 37signals, which follows on nicely from his previous investment in 43things.com. Biddulph and I have been thinking about this, and following the pattern we have determined that the next three companies that Bezos is...
Answering your Odeo questions... (June 6, 2006) About six weeks ago, I asked a bunch of you to record little voicemail messages for me using the little Odeo Voicemail-a-like feature. You can still send me these things if you want to: Send me an Odeo. Specifically I...
Cybermen are Human 2.0? (May 13, 2006) According to Doctor Who, the Cybermen are Humans 2.0 (or more specifically, Human Point Two, which... means... very little). But I protest! I'm not sure Human 2.0 means anything at all! It's just a stupid buzzword. Of course it...
On Cyclops and the male gaze... (May 3, 2006) Okay. So here's a quick theory that cropped up in my head a few years ago and I've never really got around to writing it down. It is, frankly, based on some pretty vague memories of some fast-and-loose reading of...
In praise of chocolate business cards... (January 4, 2006) Earlier this year I went to State of Play III and I always meant to write up what happened there, but I never had time. Too easily distracted by shiny new things and by the confusion of switching jobs and...
BP adverts look just like my site! (November 17, 2005) About a month ago I was watching television and an advert for BP appeared and goddam did their new advertising aesthetic look like my site. Now I'm not seriously suggesting that they ripped off the design of my site, but...
Traffic Cone Mating Season... (July 14, 2005) I was walking through the back of Paddington, by London's Westway on my way home the other day and came across this strange orgy of traffic cones. This may explain why there are so many of the damn things...
From pirate dwarves to ninja elves... (March 15, 2004) I have always considered the profound distinction between ninjas and pirates to be an absolute one. One was either ninja or pirate - there were no inbetweens. One personality type was skilled and proficient, elegant and silent, contained and constrained,...
An illustration of spam... (January 16, 2004) Yesterday I received a piece of spam with a title so interesting and dramatic that I felt I had to illustrate it with Photoshop. Presenting: "Unrelenting Massive C*cks Destroy Innocent Pussies!" Addendum: Of course now my site will be blocked...
New ideas for sit-coms... (March 21, 2003) Does anyone remember this TV series? It had like six "friends" - three 'boys' and three 'girls' -and they kind of lived in this really obvious set in New York and the friends who were boys were Dorky/Slutty, Dorky/Sarcastic and...
I don't really want to talk about it... (January 28, 2003) I went to a tanning salon. Obviously I'm ashamed of myself, but it was that or fill in my tax return. I thought to myself, "You know what I'd like to do? I'd like to go to a tanning salon!"...
101 interesting facts about bruises... (September 26, 2002) I've got a huge black bruise on my leg. It's the size and colour of an over-ripe plum. I don't know where it came from. In fact all I do know is that I didn't get it through doing anything...
On making South Park characters out of my friends... (June 6, 2002) Some people I know: Mr Webb, who has a website. Phil also has a site. Mo - unsurprisingly - has a site too. Oh gosh, Jones has a site. That was a surprise. I think James has a site as...
God Save The Queen... (June 3, 2002) I couldn't stop myself. God knows I tried. I spent ages tarting this up more, but in the end I cut all the fluff out of it and kept it to the basics - an image of a modern queen,...
On a web-based intermediary for hit-men... (June 21, 2000) Katy and I have just had a great idea for a new money-making venture targetting a completely underexploited section of the e-marketplace - professional hitmen and the criminally violent. The idea is just like that in Strangers on a Train,...
On Mark's Barbelith dream... (June 19, 2000) Sometimes Mark just does the coolest things (and of course, if he got himself permalinks, we could treasure them forever, instead of being forced to quote them at length): barbelith dream by Mark Olynciw I was an Englander, born and...
